Anxiety and Dementia: Is it a “Given” or a “Choice”

Anxiety seems to be a sideshow with someone who has dementia. And that is understandable. All of the sudden…or maybe for some folks this creeps up slowly…what used to be familiar is becoming strange. We might see–as I did indeed with my husband–a loved one confining themselves to smaller spaces to contain their world and ease their anxiousness. Some tasks become fearful, as with technology. Trying to remember passwords, how to get this unit to work with that unit…etc…so much frustration can arise for individuals. So I thought anxiety was a “given”–not just in Dementia–but in real, regular day-to-day life!

But a scary surprise I uncovered is that anxiety may possibly INCREASE the risk of Dementia
There are a lot of studies on this right now, and more research is needed. But one abstract conclusion noted that “Anxiety is significantly associated with an increased risk of all-cause dementia. The treatment or prevention of anxiety might help to reduce dementia incidence rates, but more research is needed to clarify whether anxiety is a cause of dementia rather than a prodrome.” – [Journal of Clinical Medicine 2020 Jun; 9(6): 1791

The Alzheimer’s Society notes in their May 21, 2024 post, “Can stress cause dementia?”: “A key hormone released when you’re stressed, cortisol, has been linked to problems with memory. Stress is also closely linked to conditions such as depression and anxiety. These have also been suggested as factors that could increase the risk of dementia.”

So I say, “Yipes!”
I don’t know how YOU feel about that, but I feel like trying to change those odds for me. Especially after this very stressful year with my husband’s dementia, death, and three moves. It looks like the odds are stacked against me, but I still feel hopeful. I wonder if one can make a CHOICE not to be anxious. I’ve been experimenting with that this week, and I’m sort of excited about the possibilities!

Ah, Technology… and Anxiety
I’m not excited about technology, but this story does line up with my topic, so bear with me.

The battery in my cell phone was just about gone and basically stranded me on a drive I had to take last week by myself. I had to drive about 30 minutes to a pharmacy in an unfamiliar area. That particular pharmacy had everything I needed to get updated on three immunizations. So I made it there fine, got my shots, and headed back to my car to return home. I turned on the phone and it blacked out and closed down. Whoa. My heart started beating fast and I felt an adrenaline rush.

THE BLACK SCREEN OF DEATH

I tried turning the phone on one more time and got service for a moment, phew! I immediately called a daughter to tell her where I was, should my phone black out again and I get lost coming back. She was able to figure out where I was and give me some basic directions to make sure I headed her way. But that was rather frightening, especially in crazy Colorado traffic. I’m not a fan of driving in such traffic, let me tell you!

But I am also terrible about directions. I need to be intentional about figuring out north, south, east and west! My car has something on the dashboard that tells me which way I’m heading, but I never look at it! So I need to become more conscious of where I am in relation to the mountains, etc. New goals there!! I’m usually in my own little vacuum and heading to familiar places like a robot instead of like a thinking human. But change is on the way for formerly Clueless Claire. CONSCIOUS Claire intends to START THINKING!

Back to the story: once I gratefully found my way home, I then researched to see where I could get a replacement battery for my phone. Surprise, surprise! The phone says it had an unremovable battery. So the phone was basically toast. The next week, daughter Teresa went with me to get my new phone to avoid repeating such a scenario as happened in driving and navigating. NEW PHONE. I am imagining that you all know how “fun” it is to try to get EVERYTHING all set up again on a new phone device, finding the passwords for the plentiful number of apps one tends to accumulate on one’s phone. I was feeling buried…and SUPER anxious.

And I was mad at myself for having three email addresses. I would have just stuck with my first-ever email address, but I set it up back in the years when all I could think about was trying to get my fine hair to look decent. So my email address was “claireshair…” and then I got embarrassed to pass that email address on to employers, etc., so changed to yet another address that sounded more professional. And then I had a third email address that I had when I worked at UW that they let me keep, since I had been there so long. I was one of the ANCIENT employees! And all three email addresses were used for different apps on my phone…the very phone with the black screen of death.

BUT THEN!!!!

I, myself — Clearheaded Claire — made a simple decision: I will do ONE new thing daily with my phone until it is where I want it. No more than ONE new thing. That decision took the stress off immediately and my anxiety waned. A few days this week I even did more than one thing if I was “feeling it”, but I didn’t have anxiety. All it took was to tell myself I didn’t have to do any more than one fix a day. I’m a great boss!

SO, ARE WE IN MORE CONTROL THAN WE THOUGHT??

So, point is, we may just very possibly be in control of anxiety by the decisions and guidelines we give to ourselves. I’ve got a new mindset: to preach to myself, encourage and pray for myself, praise myself when I have a success. I want to be a cheerleader for myself as well as for others. And there does need to be good balance there as well. It is healthy to look OUTSIDE yourself to note others who need that same kind of praise, encouragement, and cheerleading.

I wonder how much our mindset influences which way we head down life’s paths. We have choices. We can make decisions to build ourselves up and not tear ourselves down; and we can make similar decisions to build OTHERS up as well and not tear them down. I keep thinking of my friend Donna in an earlier post, who was encouraging me not to be so hard on myself. She was right. I’m grateful for her sweet input. So I’m writing to tell YOU to be easier on yourself too. This life is hard enough just to make decisions and battle the circumstances thrown at us daily. We DO need to encourage ourselves and one another more often. And we are frail… we will make mistakes. Get over it and get on with life. Help others to do that too. Forgive them and encourage them to move in a healthier direction.

BEING IN THE MOMENT

I also am finding that I greatly increase my own stress level if I am wrestling with too many things in my mind at the same time. I’m learning to set worries aside to deal with them at set times later. I make a few too many lists, I imagine, but I am making sure to clearly label the list pads and put the important ones on top. I tell myself if I can do one task from one To-Do pad a day–and be “in the moment with that one task”– I’m making progress. Gosh, that feels freeing, doesn’t it though??

“Being in the moment” is also SO important with folks in Dementia. Being relaxed and calm yourself can help THEM be relaxed and calm. We have such an influence on one another for good.

“LEARN TO LOVE IT”

I’ve noticed how often I tend to tell folks how much I hate the traffic in Colorado Springs. But I’ve decided I need to change my mindset and learn to love it. I will herewith stop complaining about traffic! Why? Here’s a little rabbit hole we’ll go down: I read that my favorite preacher/pastor/writer Timothy Keller said that God loves cities, because that’s where PEOPLE are, and God loves PEOPLE!

So, my takeaway/deduction is this: if there is a lot of traffic, that’s due to the abundance of humans. God loves humans. So I need to do a 180-degree turn (not in traffic, mind you!) – in my mind – and see “traffic” as individuals with lives. Those individuals are all trying to get somewhere, as am I. Smile at them, be patient, and pray. That’s my new self-appointed goal. And below is a new anti-anxiety planner I just made for myself…

If you made it to here, congratulations! And thank you for walking through with me while I processed some of MY anxiety. I hope it gives you ideas to process YOURS as well. And may it help all of us to better assist our loved ones who may have anxiety in dementia.

Next week, I may just plan to do a post on WIGS! You will be surprised at how I tie the topic into Dementia!!!