{"id":855,"date":"2018-12-20T11:35:07","date_gmt":"2018-12-20T11:35:07","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/dancingthroughdementia.com\/index.php\/home\/"},"modified":"2023-06-11T21:17:30","modified_gmt":"2023-06-11T20:17:30","slug":"home","status":"publish","type":"page","link":"https:\/\/dancingthroughdementia.com\/","title":{"rendered":"Home"},"content":{"rendered":"\t\t
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Dancing Through Dementia <\/h1>\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t
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What is the goal of Dancing Through Dementia?<\/h5>\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t
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This blog is intended to be an encouragement to other folks who have found themselves in the uncomfortable, unwelcome, un-sought-out-role of caregiver for a loved one who has dementia. I have found solace when hearing of others' struggles and victories in the dementia caregiving arena, as I realize I am not alone. So I seek to continue conversations online, working together to navigate the uncertainties as we travel down our individual--but perhaps very similar--paths.<\/h2>\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t
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Why start this blog?<\/h3>\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t
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I have “danced through dementia” with my husband’s father, who lived with us as my husband became primary caretaker for his dad. This was approximately a 5-year project.<\/p>

I then “danced through dementia” with my OWN father. My mother had died, and my sisters and I decided to place him in an assisted living facility in my hometown. We then transferred him to the memory care unit in the same facility.\u00a0 My dad lived nine years in the facility before a fall precipitated his death.\u00a0 He is the only person with dementia for whom I would say that dementia was a blessing.\u00a0 He was an alcoholic for many years. The dementia made him FORGET he was a drinker. So we had nine years with a dad who was not drinking. Although he had dementia and was losing his words, his sweet demeanor, sense of humor and kindness showed my sisters and me the beautiful side of my dad, erasing the many unhappy years of memories of the drinking dad. Wow. We’ve never heard of that happening. How blessed we were!<\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t

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Why \"Dancing Through Dementia\"?<\/h2>\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t
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First, what I DO NOT MEAN:<\/p>

I do NOT mean it’s \u201ca breeze\u201d to get through dementia. DEFINITELY not.
I do NOT mean it’s an enjoyable or romantic hobby. DEFINITELY not.<\/p>

Secondly, what I DO MEAN by “DANCING” (with dementia):<\/p>

Dancing takes being tuned in to your partner (or in our case, to the person who has dementia), going where they want to go, talking what they want to talk, being what they want you to be. It can be pretty much effortless\u2026 and rewarding. As opposed to fighting it all the way \u201ctooth and nail\u201d\u2014trying to get the person with dementia to be realistic, or to see things the way they are, to try to \u201cfix them\u201d\u2026 the pressure is off. You can’t fix these individuals. Go with the flow and be what’s needed.<\/span><\/p>

Here’s a case in point: I remember a friend named Peter, who was a CNA and then a nurse at my Dad\u2019s memory care unit. Peter said the unit was his favorite place to work, because he could play-act and be who each individual needed him to be. He told me about a gentleman who had been a pilot in a war long ago. As Peter reminisced, his face erupted into a huge smile as he remembered the gentleman who thought Peter was his long-lost friend and co-pilot. So Peter stepped in to the role of the co-pilot friend and sat down at the table to hobnob. His gentleman friend was SO excited to reunite with his old pal and laugh over their war stories. What joy it brought to Peter to see this man relive those earlier memories, reveling in the illusion of having his friend by his side!<\/p>

Another example includes my husband’s dad. One night he was up much later than normal, sitting in his recliner. Finally he spoke out loud, “I wonder where I should sleep tonight.” This coming from the man–an architect–who BUILT the very house we were living in, who had slept in his same bedroom since it was built in 1955. My mouth luckily remained closed. But I wanted to blurt out, “Oh my gosh!! You don’t know where your bedroom is??!!! Oh gosh, what’s wrong?!!!!” And I would have had everyone in a tizzy. But my husband, not missing a beat, gently said, “You would sleep in your bedroom. Would you like for me to show you where it is?” His dad replied, “Well, I would be much obliged!” Those two were such gentlemen to one another. Grandpa got up from his recliner, took his son’s arm and headed to his bedroom… “dancing” in step.\u00a0\"\ud83d\ude42\"<\/p>

Two years ago my husband was diagnosed with dementia.
I was his primary caregiver until he passed away on April 30, 2023. I have decided to proceed with this blog even though he recently passed, in order to process this journey and encourage others who are traveling this path.\u00a0 Thank you for your interest in learning more with me about dancing through dementia.<\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t

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Dancing Through Dementia Get Started What is the goal of Dancing Through Dementia? This blog is intended to be an encouragement to other folks who have found themselves in the uncomfortable, unwelcome, un-sought-out-role of caregiver for a loved one who has dementia. I have found solace when hearing of others’ struggles and victories in the …<\/p>\n

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